Trying Again

Hello World,

I’ve been writing for a long time now, and every time something bad happens – I stop.

My blog has kept so many memories and secrets that I feel it’s kind of unhealthy.

So, I have decided to start over. Completely fresh and new.

I’ll catch you up on a few things…

Before I stepped away – I was blogging about how depressed I was and to be honest, I was going through a really tough time in my life and I guess I vented online (which is not always the best thing to do). However, I am trying to shake that. I don’t want to write sad things anymore. Yes I am going to have my bad days – BUT I can always take one positive thing out of the situation and live by that. I was living a toxic life. My mom always says that if you keep on telling yourself how bad things are going over and over again – things will get worse. Which is ultimately the truth. It took me a long time to accept it, but I finally did.

More about my life… Yes I’m not 100% happy, but I have more than enough to keep me going. I have passed my 6 months at my job, and I honestly didn’t think I would be able to do it for so long. I have really bad anxiety so it all seemed so difficult and overwhelming. Yes I still have days where I might go into a panic at work, but I also have those days where I feel like I can actually do this.

I lost one of my friends in the process. There was also excuses being made whenever we wanted to hang out, so eventually I made the toughest decision and just ended it. I couldn’t do it anymore, and it was killing me inside to be let down each time… so eventually I just stopped talking to her.

Ghosting is probably not the best way to end a friendship, but if I think about it now, there really wasn’t another way.

I won’t say I’m happy or doing great, but it’s not going bad. I’m actually fine. I have those days, but damn I’m kind of kicking life’s ass at the moment.

I still have a long way to go, but I’m getting there one step at a time.

I hope you’ll stick by me on my new journey of life.

So, to new readers – Welcome.

To my loyal readers – I’ve missed you.